I need a boost of confidence

I blogged about my Muddy Fox Explorer yesterday, which promptly nudged the old memory cells at the back of my brain and set my cogs a whirring. Consequently, I was obliged to spend two hours when I should have been asleep going through our box of crappy old photos, looking for the above picture of my old bike. Actually, I found the picture almost immediately, but that didn't stop me ooohing and aaaaahing over all the other photos which I simply had to go through one by one.
One interesting thing to note is the 'biopace' front chain rings... they are elliptical instead of circular. The idea was to improve the smoothness of the pedalling action.

It's just under 9 weeks to L'Etape, and I must admit that I'm leaking any confidence which I had like a leaky sieve with extra holes in it. It's a combination of factors. Initially I made big advances and really pushed myself. I did an 80 miler and quickly followed that with a ton. But since then I've lacked the time and inclination to repeat the 100, and I'm slightly dreading the thought of doing it again. There is also the feeling of impending doom when I think of the bum ache which I have to go through. Jacko has sent me a new 130mm Toupe saddle and I've fitted it and given her a go. The verdict..... I think it's better, but I'm not sure yet.
I've also got a bad back. I think it's down to lugging the heavy amplifiers in and out of the car for our gig last Saturday, but it might also be the cycling that's doing it. That worries me.

Today, I had some academic work to do. I'm preparing a couple of lectures and then I went through a load of old X-rays looking for cases of cycling injuries on Island patients from the last few years. I've seen some beauties.

Outside, it was tipping it down , but I was ready to ride at about 3 pm as it seemed to be clearing. I planned a fast 30 miler around the far West Wight. After only 15 minutes the sky's opened again and I got another drenching. Sodden. I think the new saddle may be a winner but this ride only lasted less than 2 hours so I can't be certain yet.

I'm deliberately taking it easy this week because The Hampshire 100 is coming up this Sunday. We expert athletes call it tapering. I want to be fizzing with vim and vigour come Sunday morning, with my legs loose and strong, not aching and stiff. I'm a little anxious that I am going to really struggle. 103 miles with loads of hills and a tough finish apparently, according to the website. I planned to do this event way back at the start of my campaign, and in a way it will let me know if I'm on course for the Etape. I feel that by blogging I'm setting myself up for public humiliation. On the other hand, if it goes OK on Sunday, I'll feel really chipper .

Oh well. I'll do my best. I'm looking forward to a nice semi-social ride with 2 work colleagues from the mainland on Thursday. We're planning a gentle 30 miles. BUT, one of these guys is an ex-pro rider, he's about half my age, and so I think I'll be tying an old railway sleeper to his rear wheel.